The Main Components Of Codependency

By Leslie Ball


There are many different types of relationships. Codependent ones are recognized as dysfunctional. This is because they include a person who support or enables the addiction, poor mental health, underachievement, immaturity or irresponsibility of another individual. A major sign of codependency is excessive reliance on others for approval and identity.

This concept is thought to have come from Alcoholics Anonymous. During the AA process, it is often discovered that issues are not just those of the addict but also their friends and family members. The co-dependent ideology ties into old psychoanalytic theory that passive dependent personalities will attach to those with strong personalities. Dependency is used often in psychology literature.

Different symptoms and behaviors are attached to this. This is especially the case because the concept has grassroots beginnings. The definition for this action may vary based on the source. In general, it is considered either subclinical and situational, or an episodic behavior of those with dependent personality disorders.

A broad definition would be that a co-dependent person is incapable of functioning on his or her own. Their thinking and actions are organized around a process, substance or other person. People who are addicted to something, whether it be drugs or gambling, might be classified as co-dependent. A rawer definition suggests that a person has to be physically or psychologically addicted and the other individual must be psychologically dependent on the behavior. Some people use the term dysfunctional family instead of co-dependent to classify this disease.

People are not considered co-dependent for showing caring feelings or behaviors. This term is only used when describing people who are excessive to a degree that proves unhealthy. Healthy empathy and caregiving is driven by conscious choice. Co-dependents are often compulsive in their actions and do not take the time to consider the consequences of such actions or their own needs that are being sacrificed.

Some professionals, including scholars and treatment providers, suggest that this behavior is an act of over-responsibility. This is what takes place when positive actions go awry. It is important that in relationships there is a balance between responsibility to self and responsibility to others.

This is recognized as a disease in which people have lost sight of themselves. In many of these cases, people give less priority to their own needs and are instead preoccupied with those of others. These relationships typically involve issues around intimacy, high reactivity, denial, dependency, boundaries, dysfunctional communication and control. Often there is some imbalance between the two parties involved, with one person being abusive or completely in control, or enabling or supporting the bad behavior of the other person.

Co-dependents usually have symptoms such as: intense and unstable interpersonal relationships, denial, dishonesty, overwhelming need to be accepted, external referencing and low-self worth. They might be incapable of being alone, have chronic boredom or emptiness, subordinate their needs for those of others, and seek constant affection. This kind of behavior can occur in any type of relationship, including romantic, work, family, friend, community or peer. People who recognize these dysfunctional situations should get professional help as soon as possible.




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